Go Ricki.

So a few weeks ago I applied for the Channel [V] Presenter Search and guess what?!

I didn’t get the job!

Well, I’m pretty sure I didn’t get the job. I did make it through to the second stage of auditions, whatever that means. I like to believe it means I tricked them into thinking I was interesting enough to be the new presenter on the basis of my video, only to let them down when they met me in person. It’s the same reason as to why I never like to meet people I’m friends with on social media in person. I’m never going to be as interesting in person as I am online. My profiles are as exciting and cool as I will ever be. I can’t live up to it. I don’t have a cool cover picture adaption of Kerouac’s ‘On The Road’, or a cool obscure tweet (that I’ve researched heavily) about why Bill Hicks was more of a social commentator than a comedian to save me.

Anyway, I got to meet Ricki Lee.

That’s right! TELEVISION’S RICKI LEE!

Or even THE MUSIC INDUSTRY’S, RICKI LEE.

Remember when she co-hosted NOVA969’s breakfast show? Of course you don’t.

It’s exciting though. To think I got to meet someone who’s had a conversation with Seal, as in the guy who sung ‘Kiss From A Rose’, is amazing. Talk about degrees of separation.

What a celebrity.

Anyway, I had to interview Ricki Lee and I think me bringing up Seal was an issue that may have cost me a proper crack at the top job. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but spending a minute and a half out of a two minute interview talking about ‘The Voice’, and what Seal ‘was actually like in person’, probably didn’t do me any favours considering the interview was supposed to be all about Ricki Lee, and not about a television program on a channel that ISN’T Channel [V].

But look, it was all I had and I had to go with. My original idea was to pretend she was ‘Ricki Lake’ and ask her what an American talk-show host was doing on a Australia music channel, then keeping the act up till Ricki got angry and walked out of the interview.

Actually, that would have been BRILLIANT. Imagine if I had done that? It would have been all ‘Between Two Ferns’ style. I could have been the next Zach Galifianakis! The people would have loved me!

Have you seen the ‘Between Two Ferns’ episode with Natalie Portman? It’s almost as good as comedy could be.

Excluding my brilliant Ricki Lee interview sketch, of course.

Anyway, good luck to whoever wins the presenter search. I feel like you probably deserve it more than I do. I’ll be fine. I’m going to start a hilarious YouTube celebrity Vlog and be the next Paris Hilton.

Wait, I mean Perez Hilton. I always get those two confused. Which one got f**ked on camera again? What? Kim Kardashian?  Geez, maybe I should make a sex tape.

Don’t steal my Ricki Lee sketch.